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"You know, we've become famous since we went it alone. Everyone there is knows us. Just name someone, anyone, and they'll know us." Tired of their boasting, Kerry called their bluff, "OK, you blokes, how about Jack Nicholson?" "Sure, yes, Jack and us are old friends, and we can prove it." So the Oobie Ootchie Trio and Kerry fly out to Hollywood and knock on Jack Nicholson's door and sure enough, Jack shouts, "Oobie Ootchies! Great to see you! You guys and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!" Although impressed, Kerry is still sceptical. After they leave Nicholson's house, Kerry tells the trio that he thinks Nicholson recognising them was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else," Steve Kiely asks. "President Obama," Kerry quickly retorts. "Barak? Bazza?! (Altogether): Baaar-Rakka-Rakka-Rakka-Rama!! Hey hey! Sure, he knows us, let's fly out to Washington." And off they go. At the White House, Obama spots the trio on the tour and motions them over, saying... "Oobie Ootchies, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you guys and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up." Well, Kerry is very shaken by now but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds he expresses his doubts to the trio, who again implore him to name anyone else. "The Pope," Kerry replies. "Sure!" reply the trio. "We've got relatives from Berlin, and the Pope has known us for a long time. He does this toe dancing thing. Really weird, but goes down well at parties and, like, after-Mass..."  So off they fly to Rome. The Oobie Ootchies and Kerry are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bob says, "This will never work. We can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let's just go upstairs and we'll come out on the balcony with the Pope". And they disappear into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.
Sure enough, half an hour later the Oobie Ootchies emerge with the Pope on the balcony waving to the crowd but by the time they return, they find that Kerry has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working their way to his side, Joni asks him, "What happened?" Kerry looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you blokes and the Pope came out on the balcony and the guy next to me asks... "Who the hell's that on the balcony with the Oobie Ootchie Trio?" |
